train

img_20161029_233415There are so many things I don’t get, like how people are able to sit so still with nothing in their hands, no timeline in their heads, no words bouncing off screens reflected in their eyes. I don’t get how people sit so still doing nothing and not feeling useless all the time. I don’t get how people sit and do nothing, nothing at all or how they don’t feel like every second that passes of them doing nothing, their selves slip away from them, from their grasps. I don’t get how people stand not having words in their palms, or on their lips or in their minds. I don’t get how people don’t seem to feel profoundly like they are drifting apart and one wrong move and they’ll sink away into a void. I don’t get how one can live like that, both sides- doing nothing and not doing nothing- and nothing in between- and yet that is exactly how I live. I’ve always wanted to do more than just survive, and it scares me that sometimes that’s all I do- survive¬† and not live, really live. My hands feel restless, my minds on a train traveling at 500 km/h or like the speed of electricity as thoughts whir on electric bolts around my head. I am on that train and I can’t get off.

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About theshadowsofthenight

An amateur writer and amateur artist :)
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